Hello out there...


Well, here I am. New to this, but not to the wonderful world of blogging. For the last several years I have had a myspace account. Or should I say my"drama"space. People are so fake on there. I really used to not mind the annonimity of it all was awesome. Only letting those you want to know the real you in, and playing the fool with everyone else. I did however have a few very good friends that kept up with wonderful blogs on myspace, that I will miss reading. Though my husband still has his myspace page, so I will not miss out on to much! Anyhow, back to what I was saying. Myspace became to drama filled. Between my friends in my home state of California, and people that I met online trying to start drama where it didn't belong, I finally decided enough was enough, (for me anyhow) My daughter has a myspace account, that I monitor and police very heavily. She uses it to keep in touch with her family back in Cali. So I don't mind to much. Don't get me wrong, I won't hesitate to delete it in a heartbeat. She really doesn't get on it that often though, so I don't worry to much.


So, now let me introduce myself. My name is Brandi. I am 30 years old, married to a wonderful, yet sometimes typical, man. He just turned 34 and thinks it is the end of the world! I have three beautiful children. Two fabulous girls, and one tougher than tough yet still my baby boy. My girls are actually from my first marriage, yep thats right, I, much like more than half of the rest of the population has been married once before which ended in divorce (I am sure I will be talking alot about him, unfortunately) He is not the best dad in the world, but sometimes he tries, albeit that is rare. We were young when we got married, and had a lot of issues, and in reality probably shouldn't have gotten married, but thought we could beat the odds. We are friends now, most of the time, much better friends than we ever were a couple. My girls typically go to visit him in California every summer. Although if you ask them, they spend more time with everyone but him. I hope one day he will change that.


My husband doesn't have any children other than our son. I guess you could say, I found a rarity where I am from. Where I used to live the "Babies having Babies" ratio was phenomenal. I would say much higher than pretty much everywhere else in the U.S. It is truely sad. (I, myself had my oldest daughter when I was 16.) Alas, my husband was married once before, but they didn't have any children. They too, were young when they married. He joined the military not long after they were married, and was later discharged for medical, and she decided she didn't want to be married to him anymore. There is more to that whole story, but it really isn't my story to tell.


As for me. I was born and raised in California. My parents divorced when I was very young, less than 2 yrs old. My mother lived with my grandparents for a while, then met my step-dad, Mike. My biological father, claims he tried to see me as much as he could, but was kept away by my mother. Nonetheless he joined the army when I was about 5, and was soon after sent to Europe for several years. He did re-marry, a women with two boys about my age. But I just didn't see him for many years. (More to come on him and that situation!) My step-dad raised me as if I was his biological daughter. Even when my sister was born, he showed no favoritism between us. He is definitely my hero. He was an absolutely awe-inspiring musician, and just Superman to me. He spoiled us three girls, to no end, as often and as much as he could. But when I had my daughter, the three of us lost him, he became hers, no questions asked. From the moment he saw her, all she had to do was stick out her little finger and he wrapped himself around it! And when her sister came along, well, he had to unwrap just enough to wrap around her little finger too. He loved his granddaughters more than I could, I think. He would do anything and everything for them, no matter what I said, or what my mom said. If they wanted to go to the store for candy, 10 minutes before dinner, he would go for them, or take them. It would make me so angry!! We lost my dad in 2004. Unexpectedly and suddenly, from a stroke. He was cleaning the carpets one minute, and took a bathroom break, and never spoke to any of us again. It has been devastating to all of us, but especially my children. My oldest lost the only man that was a constant in her life. My youngest daughter lost a movie partner, and playmate, and my son lost the only grandpa he could have ever known, my son was only a year and a half old. When it all happened I had to step up and take care of everyone. My mother and sister, my husband and children, and be the rock for the rest of the family. I should add here that the night my dad had his stroke, while we were all at the hospital, my parents house had a fire. Something in the garage shorted out, and it went up in a blaze. Luckily, well as lucky as you can get when you are sitting at the hospital being told your husband, father, grandfather will never wake up again, one of my sisters friends had gone to the house to get a sweater and check on the dogs, and found the fire in time to save the house itself. But everything that had been in the garage was lost, christmas ornaments, my dad's model trains, his tools, his workbench, everything. So while planning a funeral, we also had to figure out where everyone was going to stay, and schedule insurance adjusters, and contractors, and cleaning people. It was the ultimate nightmare I think. We had been staying with my grandparents about a 30 min drive away from my parents house, so everyday, I would take my daughters to school, go to my part time job and then go to my mothers house, to help with everything there. My cousins were supposed to help out too, but they flaked, and my husband and I ended up doing more and more. I almost lost my mind during that time. I know the rest of my family was going through a very difficult time also, but in my mind I had to take care of everyone because he wasn't there to do it anymore. I remember one night, very late, driving back to my grandmothers house, knowing I had once again missed tucking my children into bed, driving past a telephone pole, wondering if it would hurt if I was doing about 95. I also, couldn't help but wonder what would happen to everyone if I just drove off into the sunset. You see people do it all the time. Hear about fathers just abandoning their families everyday, what about a mother? But I knew I could never do that. So, my husband and I had a long talk and decided it was time to move. For our families sake, and for our sanity. It was the best for everyone.


So we find ourselves here in Georgia. It has been nearly 4 years since we moved out here. And I don't believe I have ever been so happy. I love it here. During the first year here, I felt so much stress dissolve. I hadn't ever realized, how unhappy I really was in California. Don't get me wrong, I miss my family beyond words. But, our lives and far beyond what they could have been in California. We both have awesome jobs. I love mine, my husband, well, he wouldn't mind a new one. Our children are doing great. The girls miss California alot, but they have more memories of it than my son. So that is natural. They do like it here though, and have made alot of friends.


Well, I guess for an intro blog, this has taken the cake! I hope to write more and more. I love to write, and write a mis of both fiction and non-fiction. I tend to rant and rave, and blubber and cry. I can go off on a tangent, and then write about a fabulous weekend. That is what blogging is for though.... isn't it!


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1 comment:

Jenn Harrison said...

Welcome to the blogging world! You can bet I'll be keeping tabs on you! (Although I guess I could just walk around the corner to your office to find out what's up!)

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